To be honest I've been trying, fairly indelicately, to close or outright kill connections recently between myself and others. As you know there is that looming problem overhead, and this time there's no grace extended. It's sixteen days into the month and even with the best of wild imaginings I can't imagine being hired before the two weeks are out at this rate.
Sometimes when a friend holds you close and you've simply more despair and rage than you can contain, you'd rather shove them away and run with a pretense at cruelty than actually let them in where you know the real thing will spike at them. It'll be easier to disappear, you think to yourself, if they're less concerned. There is the mild balance between making sure they won't hate you forever, in case you should manage to return, and between leaving them so attached that they offer you a bed from pity. .
Without the matters of heart and feeling to think about, surely it'll be easier to get along with facing the future.
No doubt I'm actually terribly wrong to do these things, but have you ever had that terrible little internal struggle where consolation actually made something hurt worse, and all your distractions simply made it more terrible acute in your mind?
Ah- that's where we get into the title.
-I'm- not going to be there for much longer, but I wanted to share something a few of you might enjoy.
is a small roleplaying group seeking new members. Don't know anything about Dragon Age? You don't actually have to. Several of the existing ones are still learning about Thedas, and since it's dealing in new lands and bits (see for yourself on their journals if you're interested!), you don't need to learn a thousand and one things about the games. It's fairly casual, too, so if you've any questions and you're polite someone is sure to help you out.
Saying I love you all is counterproductive to the first aim stated, but I give you my fondest goodbye if it doesn't work out, anyway. I've elected not to respond to your well wishes, but I've appreciated them between the bashing head into walls and general arghhhh.